Something I Never Forget 

Pastor Jan L. Spencer 

“And when the blood of Your martyr Stephen was shed, I also was standing by consenting to his death . . .” (Acts 22:20).      

     I am grateful for the hand of God in my life as expressed over the years I have been a believer, and especially for these last 25 unbelievable years Yolanda and I have served Jesus and you at Living Way. These have been among the best days of our lives and cause me to pause and reflect on my entire life’s journey. I wish I could report that everything I have done my whole life was righteous and good, but I cannot. One of those glamour-less memories comes to mind as I consider a passage we will be covering in our life journals during the month of February 2010 . . .

     Acts 22:20 is part of a speech Paul the Apostle gives to an enraged mob in Jerusalem that has gathered to kill him. During the speech he recalls that as a young man he witnessed and consented to the stoning of Stephen, the first martyr of the church. A deep impression was made upon Paul’s soul as he stood there watching one stone after another being thrown until Stephen breathed his last. God used that memory in Paul’s life in relation to the life-changing call he received to preach the Good News to the world of his day.

     Critical events, both positive and negative, can leave a lasting impression in a person’s soul, and can serve as moments of destiny that God can use to shape a person’s life. One of those kinds of events comes to mind as I read about Paul’s consent to Stephen’s death. I, too, had a critical moment of consent as a youngster that served as a destiny shaper in my life. That critical moment came during the time I was an older elementary aged boy and participated in a crime against a neighbor. The boy next door was a good friend and we were generally good kids. However, a boy down the street from my house became a sort of group leader for us and under his tutelage we concocted a plan to destroy some property of another kid who lived in our neighborhood. I my mind’s eye I can distinctly recall how I helped to hack up that kid’s baseball bat with a hoe, smash a camera we stole from his garage, and place dirt into the front-loading clothes dryer also located in his garage.

     I will never forget the day that the police drove up to our home. I can still recall the feelings of regret that flooded my soul, and I am still thankful these many years later that God helped me to experience the embarrassment of hurting someone else without a cause. I am also grateful that my parents took me to that neighbor’s house so that I could personally apologize to that kid, and to his entire family, for what I had done.

     That destiny event, in spite of the negativity of it, helped me to recognize the value of other’s lives and served to enlighten me as to the importance of the soul’s God would eventually place into my hands as a parent and as a pastor. May I never again consent to someone else’s hurt. What was for me something I would like to forget became something that God used to shape my life and underscore how much He wants me to love the people He died to save.